Have you ever been watching or even participating in an amateur or professional game where someone unintentionally scored a goal on their own team? Someone gets turned around on a fumble in football and runs into the wrong endzone or a shot towards the goal from the opposing team in soccer or hockey hits a defending player and it goes into the goal instead of keeping it out?
It happens a lot in many sports when a goal is scored or reached but unfortunately it happened in the wrong goal! Of course the players involved are embarrassed, half the fans are exasperated, even outraged and the coach of the team wonders what in the world just happened and how did he or she deserve that result.
For example, Carmelo Anthony, a likely Hall of Fame NBA candidate, playing for the New York against the Charlotte Hornets, went up for a defensive rebound as the Knicks were closing in on tying the game, and accidentally tipped the ball into his own basket. Oops.
Of course, other goals apart from sports also go unmet or result in the exact opposite of what was hoped for. I’ve attended concerts, even involving groups or soloists I’ve enjoyed before, and actually left early because for some reason the entertainers chose another direction and plan for the evening.
Maybe you applied for a job you were looking forward to, got hired and a few weeks in realized your role wasn’t going to be anywhere close to what you so wanted it to be.
And yes, sometimes we have to learn through experience, maturity and wisdom how to seek after goals that will have long-lasting, productive and fulfilling outcomes and not be distracted by goals that seem good now but won’t be before long.
So as we head into 2025, let me offer a few principles that I’ve found helpful in making sure I don’t accidentally find myself inadvertently and unintentionally aiming at the wrong goal. Maybe one or more of these will keep you out of your own net so to speak.
First, do your homework. Jesus said in Matthew 10:16, “Be as shrewd (wise) as snakes and as innocent as doves.” Wrong goals may be obvious or somewhat hidden but if we don’t investigate things ourselves and simply go forward because the outside wrapper on the product looks good, the results are on us.
Check out the company, the fitness facility, the organization, the leadership, the past results, etc. before making any commitment towards a person or group that you think will move you forward.
Second, know your limits, skills and passions. It’s okay not to be good enough, talented enough or have enough time to fully or even in part pursue a particular goal. But Jesus said this in Luke 14:28, “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it?”
Throughout my leadership years, I’ve talked often with my team or coworkers about two kinds of hard challenges. Doable hard and Destructive hard. Lots of good things are challenging and need to be to lead to success. However, some plans are going to be so tough that they tear people and groups down, they steal motivation and enthusiasm because the tasks are pretty much impossible.
We need to consider which part of the difficulty spectrum our goal will likely land on. Let me simply say for now that the items to look for on the personal, destructive side are: Not enough time, not enough skill and not enough passion.
Which leads to a third consideration. How excited and passionate am I about this goal? Maybe you do have the skills and have checked out key details. Those things are critical, but you’ll still never find fulfillment in your goal unless you have something deep within your heart and soul that makes reaching that goal one of the key highlights of your life.
Your pursuit doesn’t need to be world-changing, but for you it needs to have the potential of life-change. It may be losing weight with the dream of feeling so much better, being so much more productive and even living longer. But if a couple of friends said, “Hey, let’s start going to the gym three days a week and losing a few pounds,” the motivation is going to be harder to sustain.
Spending more time with family, going back to school, switching jobs, committing to serving at your church or attending a weekly Bible study, etc. all need to be examined in these three areas. And once you get headed in the direction of your goal, make your early steps doable.
Too lofty attempts early on such as, “I’m going to the gym every day,” or “I’m going to read 3 chapters of my Bible by tomorrow,” are doomed to failure pretty quickly.
Success breeds success. That’s why Jesus encouraged being shrewd or wise. Proverbs 21:5 says it well, “The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.”
And for what it’s worth, I’ve found my most important goal setting has come in the area of relationships – marriage, kids, extended family, close friends, neighbors.
Maybe that’s a good place to start. That just might make New Year’s resolutions into New Year’s revolutions. Just don’t score in the wrong goal. See you next time in 2025.
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