Find Some Real "Happy" Five Ways

A few years ago, I wrote a chapter in a book about what things tend to give us enjoyment. I and twenty-three other writers were asked to each write one chapter describing a thing, action, relationship, experience or perspective that makes us feel happy. I guess it became a top seller in its Amazon category, but I’m not sure it was that great. But maybe that makes me a “bestselling author” now.

Stayed tuned for announcements about my upcoming book tour, three public library visits in Kokomo, Indiana. Well, near Kokomo. Okay, you can get to Kokomo in less than an hour from each location.

But I digress. The happiness book did contain a few thoughts that sounded pretty good, but many said the same thing, which might be best described as “really?” So while I don’t have the final word on Happy, though some think Pharrell Williams did, I’ve got a few key principles from the Bible, years of counseling, reading and lots of living that I think are good reminders of where life’s greatest satisfaction and joy comes from.

Principle 1: Happiness is a choice.  As one of my favorite authors and climbers, Tim Hansel, wrote in a book, You Gotta Keep Dancin’, “Pain is inevitable, Misery is optional.”

I find it interesting how many people in much of the media, the commentators, podcasters, some government people, even religious leaders are usually complaining, criticizing, blaming and never finding much good in anyone or anything apart from their own world, opinions and preference.

But happy people have problems, concerns and others that may make life hard for them and yet they still choose to be thankful, find the good and keep moving forward, doing things for others and the like. Happiness is a choice. Romans 12:12 says, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction.” 

Happy people can do that in part because they know they still have the freedom and ability to choose better.

Principle 2 is related to 1 and is simply this: Happy people don’t blame their hardships and challenges on others. Some people are often part of the problem if that applies. But don’t let what they’ve done keep you from enjoying what you WILL do. And accept that some challenges in life just happen. Happy people still roll with the punches so to speak and then overcome the problem and move on.

We can so easily give others the power to keep us from enjoying life, finding fulfillment and living optimistically even in the hard times.

Romans 12:12 says, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction.”  Or in the Old Testament book of Joshua it says, “Choose this day who (or what) you will serve.”

Blamers rarely grow and are rarely happy.

Third, happy people aren’t bored.  They’re doers, not those who spend most of their time just being entertained. Unhappy people do the same things over and over and waste a lot of time on things that really don’t matter. Listen sometime to the people around you talking at the bar or a nearby table. Many of them seem to  focus the whole time on eating, their drinking habits or competing to have the best story. But happy people are eager to try something new, bring variety into their life and not get stuck.

Which leads to #4. Happy people engage in purposes bigger than themselves. They find a need in their family, neighborhood, school, church, community, even country and decide (happiness is a choice remember) to do something to help, even lead a project to meet the need.

Psalm 57:2, “I cry out to God who will fulfill his purpose for me.” But we must be willing to engage in it, not just hope it happens.

Fifth. happy people help make other people happy. You’ve probably heard the phrase, Hurt people hurt people.  Well happy people help people through serving, assisting, resourcing, listening to them, caring when in need.

So feeling a little down this week? Choose happiness, let go of the blame game, try something new and different, live with purpose – yours and make someone else’s day.

And, if you want, go listen to Pharrell’s Happy song. It’s been a while hasn’t it and maybe he can use the royalty money.